Ted Haggard

I know Ted Haggard. I've known him since 1997--ten years. I've read three of his books, visited the church he founded, heard him speak to groups of thousands and groups less than 100, I have shaken his hand and had brief conversation with him.

I don't know Ted Haggard. I know nothing of his personal life. I've never been in his home, never met his family, never been in a car with him, never talked with him on the telephone, never socialized with him. I couldn't tell you what his favorite music is, what periodicals he reads, or how he feels about the war in Iraq. The Ted Haggard of current headlines who was just fired from his church, who admits to unspecified sexual misconduct and buying illegal drugs is someone I do not know.

So what am I to think about these revelations? First, I feel profound sadness for his family. How hurtful this must be for them. Next, I feel for his congregation in which I have relatives. The shock of realizing their pastor wasn't all he appeared to be will be a trying thing to work through. Nobody enjoys feeling like they have been had. It will take some time to recover from the sense of betrayal and violation of trust.

Strangely, I don't feel betrayed. I guess I've been around the block enough times that nothing surprises me anymore. I know what Jesus knew when he dealt with the woman caught in adultery. There ain't nobody without sin. We're all broken and struggling with some issue in our lives. I expect everyone to fail at some personal level sooner or later. The greater one's personal celebrity and sphere of influence, the more far reaching will be the consequences of one's failure. This understanding of our human condition makes forgiveness (and tolerance) easier for me. Not always easy, mind you, but easier than it would be otherwise.

Today I am happy for Ted Haggard. The crushing burden of a secret life he was trying to keep secret is being lifted off his shoulders. The healing grace that comes from confessing our faults to each other is within his grasp. He will soon discover who his true friends are--the ones who will stick close and help him in his time of need. These will be the people with whom he will be able to create authentic accountability. I wish Ted Haggard well and pray that he will find God to be an ever present help in time of trouble.

I also pray that more of us will learn what a disservice we do to each other when we create relational dynamics that encourage secret lives. People live secret lives out of shame and fear--fear of rejection, fear of judgement. When we do not have people close to us with whom we can safely share our struggles, weaknesses and dark times, we are much more susceptible to opt for hypocrisy and a double life. We will develop a public and private persona. As the former President of the National Association of Evangelicals, Ted Haggard knows that relational safety is a rare thing in those circles. Evangelicals, who have politically postured themselves as the cultural morality police, are, for many, the last group someone might look to for a forgiving, welcoming embrace. That's why we continue to watch the list grow of prominent evangelical "spokespersons" and political crusaders whose secret lives hit the headlines.

Here's one of the strangest recorded conversations between Jesus and his disciples: "Then Jesus asked them, 'When I sent you without purse, bag or sandals, did you lack anything?' 'Nothing,' they answered. He said to them, 'But now if you have a purse, take it, and also a bag; and if you don't have a sword, sell your cloak and buy one...' The disciples said, 'See, Lord here are two swords.' 'That is enough,' he replied" (Luke 22:35-38). TWO SWORDS! ENOUGH! FOR WHAT? The context indicates Jesus said this shortly before what Matthew described as "a large crowd armed with swords and clubs" showed up in Gethsemene with Judas to arrest Jesus--an event that Jesus had clearly warned his followers was about to take place. Then, when one of his disciples drew one of those swords and took a swipe at one in the armed crowd cutting off an ear, Jesus sternly told the preemptive striker to put that sword away uttering those now famous words, "for all who draw the sword will die by the sword" (Matthew 26:32). Here's how I see all this. Jesus told his followers that they were about to have a confrontation with the Roman military and some really upset religious leaders who were bent on killing him. Tongue in cheek he said they should arm themselves. Yup. Two swords ought to do it, two swords against the super power of the day armed to the hilt with swords and clubs? What a joke! Considered in light of everything else Jesus had said about peacemaking and loving one's enemies, it should have been obvious to his disciples he had no intention that they resort to violence. Luke's account of these events quotes Jesus saying to the preemptive striker among his followers, "NO MORE OF THIS!" (Luke 21:51), clearly demonstrating Jesus' opposition to such preemptive violence. Will we ever learn the lesson? Preemptive armed aggression against one's foes only promotes more violence and is not to be the behavior of anyone identifying themselves as a follower of Jesus. I wish world leaders today would get this through their "stay the course" heads. NO MORE OF THIS!